Five Years Ago

I love my TimeHop app.

I love seeing photos and reading posts I made on this day however many years ago.

It's a good way for me to measure how far I've come in life.

I sometimes cringe at the stuff I used to post 5,6, and 7 years ago.

I was immature,  and I was definitely an "overshare-er" of politics, religion, and controversy on social media.

These days, I tend to stick to happy posts, pictures of my kids, and my life.

Today, this popped up on my TimeHop from 5 years ago...

  I can't remember my exact emotions on the day he told me this.

I'm sure a sense of relief followed by a "holy shit" came about.

All day today, I've been thinking about this post.

It's been a constant nag in the back of my mind.

What if he would have gotten on that helo?

My life would be so different today. 

Some of the greatest friends I've made because of this life with Nick would not exist in my life.

There would be no Mattis...

I literally can't breathe when I imagine a life without Nick.

My stomach literally feels like an empty pit, and my heart begins to race with anxiety.

I feel this way even though he is currently safe and sound, right here next to me working on school work.

Looking back on this one little post I put on Facebook 5 years ago....

It's really hard for me to ever think that I have questioned if God really exists. 

I am so grateful that He brought Nick home every single time safely back into our family.

Crazy that something I wrote 5 years ago on Facebook had the potential to change my life forever.

Do you have TimeHop?