When Being a Stay at Home Mom Feels Unimportant

SIX days until Christmas. How did this happen? It was literally Thanksgiving like a week ago, right?! I thought I'd do a better job keeping up with this thing, but based on my last post, I have failed miserably. I feel like our family has been non-stop for the last month! Between Christmas shopping, weddings, kids class parties, working out, and being a wife, life hasn't been very generous with extra time for me.

It's actually shocking at how busy I am despite the fact that both of my kids are in school during the day, and I don't work. Every time I go to the nail salon, the nail lady ALWAYS asks me, "you off work today?" I always answer with, "I'm a stay at home mom", to which they reply with a judgmental tone, "what do you do all day when your kids are in school?"

It shouldn't bother me, but it does. I think I tend to compare my life as a mom now to my former life as a Marine, and that is a dangerous slope to go down. My life's purpose has changed drastically in the last 5 years, and there are days when I dwell on my former life as a career woman that led our nation's finest. My current life consists of volunteering in my son's Kindergarten classroom with a bunch of kids who don't wash their hands, but constantly want to touch me. Oh, and being the doting "trophy" wife to my wonderful Marine hubby (insert sarcasm).

Does this mean I wish I was back in the Marine Corps? Absolutely not. I love my life. I love being able to be so involved in my children's lives and in their schools.

 I love walking into my son's classroom to volunteer and see his face light up at the sight of me. 

I am fully aware at how blessed I am to be able to live a life where I do not have to work to provide for our family. I love baking and cooking goodies to send to work with my husband for his Marines. I love having dinner ready as soon as my husband walks in the door from a long day's work. But this life is so drastically different than just 6 short years ago that I still have days when I don't feel "important". I hear this is a common feeling amongst veterans that are finding their way in civilian life after service.

Anyway, I am hoping in the new year that I can finally get this blog updated to match my "not so new anymore" domain name. I thought of switching it over to Wordpress, but I'm pretty happy and comfortable here on blogger. My content is not changing, and this is just a little side hobby that I have, so staying here just seems right. I will probably post a "year in review" post towards the end of the month before 2019.

If you want to see what is going on in our life, just follow me on instagram @semperag_blog

Hope everyone is having a stress free and cheerful holiday season!

Here is our 2018 Christmas card (front and back)

Thanks to Shutterfly, of course!

Election Thoughts and Veteran's Day Weekend

 So...

Since my last blog post, we have a new President-elect....

This is all I have to say (my blog isn't a political blog, so this is it!)....

I have many friends who are deeply saddened by the outcome of the election...most of whom are friends in the minority, LGBT, and muslim communities.

(So you can imagine, mostly friends who did not vote for Trump).

If you did vote for Trump, disregarding their anger, fear, and frustration as being silly and wimpy is just plain rude.

Telling them to "get over it" is self absorbed in a way.

I read on FB today that summed up my feelings about the people saying "get over it"...

"Interestingly, the folks screaming "get over it!" will cry for weeks when their football teams don't make it to the Super Bowl. They're still griping about deflated footballs and whatever other scandals befall their teams"

 Puts it into perspective right?

I don't talk about who I voted for.

People can take educated guesses, but I will never openly say it on social media.

I don't talk about it because it's none of your business, and people are jerks.

I don't even really talk about with some of my closest friends.

All I am saying is, regardless of who you chose to vote for, have some compassion and respect for those who are genuinely upset or feel differently than you.

(I'm also going to add that needing a "day off" from class to mourn and violently protesting the loss of your candidate is absolutely absurd and ridiculous...but feel free to protest peacefully...it's your right.)

On to better, happier things...

Check out my lovely painting I did with watercolor!

If you're an artist, art major, art collector, art teacher, art enthusiast.......DON'T JUDGE! 

I'm actually very proud of myself.

 One of the military wives hosted a social at her house for all the military spouses.

She did a paint and wine night, and it was an absolute blast!

One of my favorite things about military life is getting together with other military spouses to socialize.

We just "get each other" in a way that regular spouses don't understand.

Random photo of Dannika because her outfit was "on fleek"...

Our sweet nanny turned 22 last week, so Mattis and I hooked her up with a donut tower from Shipley's!

 Veteran's day was last Friday, and you can read about why I am the "totally awkward veteran". 

I tend to focus more on our older veterans and particularly our Vietnam veterans. 

I feel like they never got a proper "welcome home", and that they deserve a lifetime of our respect and gratitude.

Yes, I am a veteran, and I am not discounting my service as less than, but if you read my "awkward veteran" post, you'll know why.

Nick and I were asked to do a veteran's day talk for Dannika's second grade.

I think Nick is a great speaker, so I asked him to set it up, and I would talk at the end.

He did a great job teaching the kids the difference between Veterans day and Memorial day, and he set up a GREAT display for all the kids! (see below)

We even got Dannika's teacher involved and dressed her up in a FROG suit...complete with load bearing vest and AMMO!

She looks really comfy, doesn't she?!

Afterwards, our family headed to the Dixie Chicken to participate in their walk for the "Boot Campaign". 

"Boot Campaign is dedicated to promoting patriotism for America and our military community; raising awareness of the unique challenges service members face during and post-service; and providing assistance to military personnel, past and present, and their families. Retail sales of combat boots, apparel and mission-focused merchandise, general public donations and corporate sponsorships fund programs that support military families. These efforts extend to all generations of military personnel who endure significant physical, emotional and circumstantial hardships resulting from their service and sacrifice."

Afterwards, we stuck around so that Nick could dunk his Aggie Ring (more on that later!).

They had live music, and we stuck around to watch Clayton Gardner perform.

Fun fact: I had a class with him last semester!

So the Aggie Ring Drunk tradition is not a university sponsored tradition (and is actually discouraged by the University itself).

However, Aggies are all about their "traditions", and the "Ring Dunk" has become ingrained as tradition.

You can read in detail about it here. 

In a nutshell...

"A student drops their newly-acquired Aggie Ring into a pitcher of beer, chugs the entire pitcher, and then catches the ring in their teeth. This tradition began in the 1970s when a [student] accidentally dropped his ring in his beer and figured chugging what was left in his glass was the best way to get his ring back. Word spread - though unofficially, as the bar (The Dixie Chicken) in which the first dunk took place never advertised - and the tradition was born. It's actually a pretty big deal for some people; parties are thrown in honor of and siblings, parents, and extended family members (especially those who are Aggies themselves) come into town to witness ring dunks"

Nick, being the traditional Aggie that he is needed to do it at the famous Dixie Chicken where it all started.

 Many students today choose to do it at other places, but it all began here...

Our sweet friend (whom our daughter and her daughter are BFFs) owns the chicken, and being the amazing and gracious friend and host that she is...she hooked Nick up with his own Dixie Chicken pitcher to dunk his ring in.

Typically, students let their beer sit out for days to let it go flat before dunking their ring.

Then they dunk their ring at room temperature.

I guess this makes it go down easier?

YUCK!

Nick did his straight out of the tap...cold Bud Light....

He did it in 1 minute and 6 seconds!

Congrats Nick!

You're official!

Afterwards, Dannika and her best friend came over to have a sleepover.

Saturday was the military appreciation game at A&M.

We played Ole Miss and suffered a devastating loss.

But our kids had a blast...and at the end of the day...it is just football.

Nick was in uniform for the game because he was part of the flag unfurling ceremony at Kyle Field.
I won't go into detail about why I was not part of it (politics....that did not have to do with me being a woman veteran because several people asked me that)...but I am over it..

The Fightin' Texas Aggie Band!

Despite the loss, our family had a wonderful time at the game. 

One of my favorite things to do is feeding people.

Seriously!

I love cooking for people.

I invited two sweet Aggie girls I am interning with this semester and a midshipman in the Aggie Corps of Cadets for dinner on Sunday.

We sat around the dinner table until 930 just talking and telling stories.

I truly love the energy, passion, and insight these young people bring.

People my age and older always seem to be complaining about "those millenials", but none of them ever really sit down to get to know them.

As a 32 year old undergrad, I have the unique perspective of observing the younger people of my generation and being "withing their population" (some call me a millenial, some call me the last of generation X).

Yeah...some of these young kids annoy me like no other (but people my age annoy me like no other too).

But our young people have a fire and a lot to say!
If you're one complaining about millenials...you haven't truly met a "real Millenial". 

These girls have so much knowledge and passion to offer the world.

They're going to be world changers.

I am proud to know that they are our future. 

 So there you have it! 

If you made it this far in my blog, thanks!

If you skimmed through it, and are reading this....I am not your friend any more (kidding).

Have a fabulous week, y'all!

TAMU Marine Corps Birthday Ball

One of my favorite things about being a Marine/Marine wife is our annual Marine Corps birthday celebration.

As a student veteran, I've gotten to meet some pretty amazing veterans from ALL branches of service.

I have nothing but utmost respect for all of them. 

Anyone who chooses to serve our country deserves respect in my book!

HOWEVER...

I have yet to meet a veteran from the Army, Navy, or Air Force talk about how amazing their birthday celebrations are.

In fact, while hanging out at the Veterans Resource Center on campus a few weeks ago, I asked veterans from each branch of service to tell me off the top of their head what day was their branch of service's birthday was.

NONE of them could tell me.....one Navy guy did, but only because I told him happy belated birthday...to which he told me it was not his birthday.

I told him it was the Navy's birthday the day prior, and he looked surprised.

EVERY. SINGLE. Marine said in unison, "November 10, 1775 devil dog!"

Other branches hate us, and like to talk smack about us.

But the truth is, we are such a different breed of people...no one will ever "get us" unless they get on the "inside".

And our dress blue uniform is BY FAR, the sexiest uniform out there.

I have yet to meet a solider, seaman, or airman disagree with that.

I have met people from different branches who we always have friendly banter with about "who is the more 'superior' branch of service", but at the end of every argument...when a Marine says...

"Our dress uniforms are better..."

The argument ends...the Marines win.

No one ever argues that point.

The Marine Corps birthday is actually November 10th, but units and organizations celebrate it according to where it fits their schedules. 

The Texas A&M Naval ROTC held their Marine Corps birthday/Navy birthday ball this weekend.

It was held at the College Station Hilton, and Nick and I had an absolute blast!

the 2016-2017 Marine Corps MECEP students.

Pretty much the best looking group of Marines out of every University in the U.S.

The two Gunnys....

Nick and GySgt Anderson.

GySgt Adnerson is one of the Assistant Marine Officers Instructors at A&M.

Nick and Chris.

Chris is a senior at A&M (obviously by his boots), and he is a Marine Officer Contract!

He'll graduate next May and commission.

There is a pretty good possibility that he and Nick will go to TBS together.

(he also has a very lovely fiancé)

 Nick and Sgt Johnson

Nick and I collect challenge coins, and I was pretty excited to add a new one to our collection from the ball last night!

I think it is my new favorite one.

From L to R: Regina, me, Mary, and Jill...

Regina is a friend of Jill, Mary is the wife of the Colonel who was the professor of Naval Science before Jill's husband, and Jill is the wife of Colonel Bright, the current professor of Naval Science!

The cake!

Members of the Aggie Corps of Cadets get to wear these boots when they become a senior.

They're a huge deal, and we have lots of former Aggie friends who have them encased in glass and on display in their homes!

Nick and some of the cadets.

These young handsome dudes will be Marine Officers once they graduate (Lord help us! lol).

We had such a great time at the ball, and thank you to everyone who complimented Nick and me!

Dear Aggie Football

Let me start off by first saying that I LOVE Texas A&M and Aggie football. 

Texas A&M has been a dream school of mine since I was young girl growing up here in College Station.

The university offers one of the best educations that one can receive, the research and research opportunities are remarkable (hello...we ARE the pioneers when it comes to cloning animals), and the rich traditions and history within this place is absolutely mind-blowing!

There is no other university I could EVER see myself attending, and people think I am joking when I say how utterly crushed I would be if my kids do not choose to come to school here too.

I love being an Aggie, and I am damn proud of it.

Texas A&M's veterans services program has been recognized nationally as one of the best.

Our veterans services is amazing, and I have nothing but amazing things to say about it.

I also believe that the university is making a HUGE investment into their future when they accept veterans to attend Texas A&M (which they accept a LOT of).

Aggie veterans are ground breakers, self-starters, self-motivators, focused, disciplined, wise beyond their years, and extremely intelligent. 

They bring their wealth of knowledge and experience from service to our country that positively impacts the college experience for the traditional student.

Texas A&M has been recognized as one of the most pro military colleges in the United States, and as a student veteran, I can attest to that.

On November 12, Texas A&M is scheduled to host Ole Miss at Kyle Field for the military appreciation football game.

They're offering discounted tickets for veterans and active duty service members for that game.

From my past experience, the tickets they offer at discounted prices are still expensive, and the seats available to purchase are in Kyle Field's nosebleed section.

Student veterans were also asked to volunteer before kickoff to unfurl a giant American flag across the field.

Awesome opportunity!

Nick and I volunteered without hesitation.

I found out yesterday that they are short about 100 student veterans and active duty Aggies to unfurl the flag, and they have gone to desperate measures by opening it up to former Aggie veterans as well.

I found it odd that they were having such problems, so I posed the question, "do they get to stay for the game?"

My source from the student veteran organization told me "No. I was told it is too big of a game that is guaranteed to sell out for them to offer free tickets for the veterans and servicemembers who are volunteering to unfurl the flag."

Yes.

That is right.

I'm just going to add that Nick and I do not need free tickets.

Unlike the average veteran attending school here on the GI Bill, Nick is getting paid active duty pay to attend school, and our family is financially secure.

We purchase tickets to the games we want to attend, and every once in a while a generous friend will donate their tickets to us.

For the average veteran that is attending school here, this is not the case.

A lot of veterans attending school here have families and children. 

Yes, the GI Bill covers tuition, but as far as supporting a family, the small stipend the Post 9/11 GI Bill offers for housing is NOT enough to support a family and children.

Most veterans are working, not for extra spending money or just for rent and bills, but to support their families.

The last thing they have money to spend on is Aggie football tickets.

The average cost to attend a football game as a family of 4 (in crappy seats) is about $400.

Let's be real here, most veterans have a bad back, broke ass knees, and a myriad of other health issues to be standing tall with the 12th man in the student section for four quarters.

And NO veteran is going to force their children to stand with belligerent 18-22 year olds (who are wasted) for four quarters of a game either.

Our family buys the student sports passes, and we always upgrade our seats by paying the difference in price so that our old broke bodies can actually sit down and enjoy a game with our kids. 

For many veterans, it is just way too expensive to do so.

So with that said, I want to know why it is ok to ask over 200 veterans and servicemembers to unfurl a flag for publicity at a "military appreciation" game, then kick them out of the stadium if they do not have tickets.

Does that even make sense to you?

It is ONE game.

The ONE game that is a military APPRECIATION game.

Is it really going to make a university go broke to give free tickets for veterans/servicemembers who are volunteering to be on the field to unfurl the flag?

I'm not even asking for us.

Our family will happily feed the money machine that is Aggie football because we do understand how much money Aggie football brings into our university, and we are in a unique situation as a military family to be able to afford those tickets. 

 Texas A&M receives HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS of dollars from alumni every year.

Makes me wonder.

Bakes Cookies and "Stuff"

Someone posted this on Facebook the other day, and I literally laughed out loud.

If you have followed my blog for a while now, y'all have all followed my journey from transitioning from being a working mom, to a stay-at-home mom, to a mom in college....

Y'all have also gotten to follow my journey from being an active duty Marine for 10 years to being a veteran/civilian.

Those were NOT easy transitions!

If you've got some time on your hands, and you're bored, you can read about my transitions here, here, here, and here.

(There's many many more posts on my transitional periods of life, but those are just a few)

When I look back and read those posts, I was all over the place emotionally.

Some days I was on top of the world, and SO glad to be at home.
Other days, I was depressed about not having a purpose outside of the home anymore. 

Transitioning out of the military is tough, and there are whole studies dedicated to military to civilian transitioning.

They make us go to classes before we get out of the military to help us have a "smooth" transition into civilian life (which is rarely the case, by the way). 

It's why there are websites called "dysfunctional veterans" and "Uncle Sam's Misguided Children" (websites I do not support, but that's a whole another topic).

But the titles of those websites are a direct reflection of how veterans feel when they get "thrown to the wolves".

I always pictured myself as a stay at home mom that "bakes cookies and shit"....haha.

I'm not gonna lie, it was a lot of fun for a while. 

But something I learned about myself during that time in my life is that I need something more for myself outside of the home.

Some people find complete and total fulfillment in that life, but I didn't.

I guess it should have been expected considering I spent ten years of my life (the majority of those ten years) as a single, independent woman making my own money and making things happen. 

I commented on my friend's post (of that photo above):

"I couldn't wait to get out of the Marine Corps so I could be a sahm and bake cookies and shit...here I am in school full time...if that means anything to you. Lmao."

 I love my kiddos with every ounce of my human being, and I know that my calling in life is to be working, in school...just doing SOMETHING outside of the home.

That's the best version of me, and my kids deserve the best version of me for them to look up to.

Is It Friday?

Oh, you mean to tell me it's only Monday?

I have a big research paper due for my English lit class, but because the future of my children's teeth are more important than my education, I am putting off English lit today for blogging.

D & M both had dental appointments this morning, and it screwed up my brain for school.

It was Mattis' very first dentist appointment, and the chair freaked him out, so the sweet dentist ended up doing his check up with him sitting on my lap.

I must say how impressed I was with Brazos Valley Pediatric Dentistry!

Cartoons on the ceiling at every chair, video games and toys around every corner, toy dispensing machines....

Why can't adult dental practices do that?!

I'd definitely be a little more excited about going to see the devil dentist.

So let's do a little weekend recap, shall we?

Do you own a Yeti tumbler, yet?

If no, WHY NOT?!

Quick story:

On the morning of Dannika's field trip, I put ice and Diet Dr. Pepper into my Yeti tumbler at 8am.

2 hour drive to the zoo...ice still in tact and drink still nice and cold.

Left the cup in my friend's car from 10 until 1...ice STILL in tact and drink still nice and cold...after sitting in a car on a warm sunny day for almost 3 hours!

Drove home, got home around 330, and the ice was JUST beginning the melt, and my drink was STILL cold.

That SEVEN hours that my ice did not melt in this cup!

It is truly an amazing cup, and totally worth every penny!

I decided to get mine personalized, and had my friend Melissa at Expressivecuts.com make me a glittery pink version of the decal I have on my car.  

 On Friday night, Nick, some Marines, and some veterans from the Marine Corps League were invited to the opening ceremony of our local Christmas light park, Santa's Wonderland.

We hit up College Station's locally famous Layne's for dinner afterwards!

Do you have a significant other who hunts?

I do.

You know what that means?

From October until winter is pretty much over, early mornings and afternoons are spent alone while my husband sits in a tree stand for hours at a time.

Dannika has been DYING to go with Nick, so this weekend, he got her all "real tree'ed" out and took her out for a little bit.

She was over the moon.

Nick finally shot his first buck of the season late yesterday afternoon.

I was hoping this meant I'd have him home for a little while the next few weekends.

But nope.

It has just fed into his habit, and he has been wanting to kill this 12 pt buck he has spotted on his trail cam. 

So until he gets that 12pt, I will continue to spend many lonely mornings and afternoons.

Our neighborhood at its' annual Fall Festival on Saturday afternoon, so we took the kids.

They had an absolute blast, and even better, it was walking distance from our house!

Dannika rock climbing (still in her hunting boots!).

Insert turtle emoji here....

Our weekend was a blast, and it was also the last Aggie home game!

Thank goodness they won!!!!!!

As much as I love me some Aggie football, by this time in the season, I'm pretty exhausted from all the tailgates and games!

I need me a break!

Hope y'all had an amazing weekend!

Here's to another 5 days until the weekend!

Messina Hof MC Birthday Dinner

On Tuesday, Nick and I attended Messina Hof Winery's Marine Corps birthday dinner.

Everyone told us that this was a "must go to" event, so Nick and I jumped at the opportunity.

It is a semi formal Marine Corps birthday ceremony complete with dinner, cake, and of course...wine!

Paul Bonarrigo Jr. (the son of the Messina Hof Winery's founder and owner) was a former Marine, and has kept the tradition of celebrating the birthday every year at his family's winery.

The guest of honor was Nick's CO at Texas A&M, Colonel Bright.

He gave an amazing speech about the Marine Corps, and what it is today.

He talked about how even with all the changes from generation to generation, the core concept of the Marine Corps has not changed.

The crowd is not your typical Marine crowd at this event.

It's mostly older, retired Marines, and I'm pretty sure the only currently active duty Marines that were there were the Marine MECEP'ers from Texas A&M, and the Colonel. 

That's what made this evening really special though.

I got to talk to the older generation of Marines, and as humbled as I was to be amongst them, they seemed to have been humbled themselves to be amongst the younger Marines.

It's a mutual respect us Marines have for each other, young and old, old corps and new corps...

It's what makes us great. 

I scored this amazing Nicole Miller dress for an absolute steal at 50% off its' original price!

SCORE!

How gorgeous is this cake!

Anything with edible glitter is a 10 in my book!

Colonel Bright's speech

The passing of the cake from the guest of honor, to the oldest Marine (a class of '53 Aggie grad), and the youngest Marine.

You know this is an older crowd when the youngest Marine happens to be a SSgt.

The narrator of the event was a retired Cobra pilot.

As an aviation ordnanceman who worked on Cobras at one point in my career, anyone affiliated with this magnificent chopper is a friend in my book.

Col Bright's wife, Jill.

Can't hang out with Mary without being suckered into a selfie!

My handsome date and I

Nick and I had such a fabulous time.

We came home with our bellies full of delicious food, wine, and plenty of memories to share.

It was truly a perfect way to celebrate the Marine Corps' 240th birthday.

Thank you to Messina Hof Winery for hosting such a fun filled event and honoring our Marine Corps' birthday!