Semper Ag

Saturday, March 17, 2018

And The Next Duty Station Goes To...

photo from marshallsabroad.com

It's official! Our family is headed to Okinawa, Japan this fall for 3 whole years! It's a bit overwhelming, but exciting (to say the least)! When Nick and I discussed his options for duty station assignments, we both agreed that we wanted to take our kids overseas while they were still young. For as long as I can remember, we have talked about one day being stationed overseas as a family, and how much fun it would be. I want my kids to grow up well-rounded and cultured, and what better way than to give them this amazing experience?!

Nick and I have both been to Japan prior to being married (as single Marines), and while Nick did NOT take advantage of his time on this gorgeous island, I sure as heck did! I know a lot has changed since the last time we were both there (15-ish years ago), but I have always imagined going back one day. It's pretty neat that I actually get to! We also have a lot of friends who are currently stationed there, so we are excited to be reunited with them. They always say, if you stay in the Marine Corps long enough, you'll be back with friends that you have once left.

Back to reality here. I am currently stressing out about selling our house, dealing with a very emotional 8 year old, flying to Japan with Mattis (seriously, a nightmare in the making), figuring out what furniture I can/can't take with us, my job (that I love), transitioning to a foreign country, and did I mention selling our house? As a type A, control freak, all of this stuff gives me severe anxiety. I have a hard time with the phrase, "Let Go, and Let God", and I'm trying really hard not to let the little things stress me out so much.

With that said, I am also really sad to be leaving Texas. My home state. My home town. My family. My friends. My kid's school. My little cul-de-sac. My neighbors. Aggieland has literally been one of my favorite places to be, and I am so grateful for the opportunity to be able to come back here for 3 years. Our family got to experience some normalcy for once, and really got to enjoy our time as a family here. We still have one last, hot Texas summer here, so we are looking forward to making the most of it!

Tuesday, February 27, 2018

Because Every Marine Wife Deserves to Have a Breakdown

Mattis is sick. I worked from home today...AGAIN. I swear my boss probably thinks I am lying. I actually feel that I need to take photos of my son's puke, of him at the doctor, and of me sitting in the drive-thru pharmacy so I can show photo proof that my son really is sick.

My son has strep for the second time in 2 1/2 weeks. My daughter had it twice in 4 weeks between January and December. I'm over it. This mama is OVER IT. "They" keep telling me, "oh, this flu and strep season is BAD."

Yes. I know.

Everyone is sick. Everyone has the flu (some even twice). Everyone has strep.

This past weekend was a rough weekend in the Romer household. The kids' behavior, solo parenting, and just life caught up to me. Up to this point, I've been pretty good at juggling the demands of work, parenting, and self-care. I have it down to a science. But let's get real here...ALL military wives can agree with me when I say...there comes a point in every deployment or separation when a good break down is needed/expected. I've held it together like a pro since September when Nick left. I was due, and when it happened, it felt great. We are going on month 6 of being separated. I had my good cry and my breakdown Sunday night, and woke up Monday, ready for a new week.

Then Mattis got sick...again.

Murphy's law of military wife life, right? It's a real thing, y'all.

I'm not writing this for pity. In fact, there are lots of people going through way worse than me. I'm writing this, because it's OK to have a break down, and a good cry. It's being human.

So here I am, on a Tuesday afternoon. There is so much for me to be grateful for. I am grateful for a boss who allows me to have flexible hours and work from home. I am grateful for an amazing service we have here in our town where a physician makes house calls called MyDoc. I am grateful to be a mom to two healthy kids (who may or may not drive me absolutely up the wall at times). I am grateful for a husband who has one of the most honorable jobs in the world. Lots to be grateful for...

Dr. Richards is a local physician who started a business making house calls.

For the price of basically a copay, he comes to your house to diagnose and treat illnesses.

It's a Godsend.

This handsome guy has been working his butt off in TBS.

Long nights, long weeks...

Grateful for such a hardworking man.

Sweet Princess Dannika

She is so patient and so kind.

Lately, she has been driving me up the wall with her "forgetfulness".

I've been a little hard on her, but only because I know she is better.

Life is good, y'all.

Wednesday, January 17, 2018

3 Ways to Help Kids Deal with Extended Separations

Nick left the day after New Years to go back to Quantico after spending 11 WONDERFUL days with us. We got to spend 5 days in Nashville at my sister's house for Christmas, and we spent the remainder of his leave back in our home in Texas. As always, the time seemed entirely too short, and we were all sad to see him leave. My youngest son takes it especially the hardest on the day when Nick leaves. He tends to be a little more defiant, and a little more difficult. He acts out with tantrums over the smallest things. Also, every single time, on the first night, he pees in ~~his~~ my bed the first night (cause my kids sleep with me when Nick is gone). I don't know if his anxiety and frustration of his daddy being gone causes him to pee himself at night, or if it's just a coincidence. I have figured out a few ways to make life "normal" for my kids, and to make these separations just a little bit easier.

Here 3 simple things that I do to help our family deal with extended separations:

Routine, routine, routine! I can not stress how much a good routine makes life a little more manageable when Nick is away. I literally plan every minute of our day. It gives my kids familiarity in a season of life that is not familiar (or comfortable) for them. It also gives me some sanity, and it helps the days go by quickly. Each day feels purposeful for me. We eat dinner at the same time every week, I have the exact same gym routine every week. Everything from my laundry routine to my dishes get done at the same time every week. This may sound a little OCD to some people, but ask any military wife, a solid routine is key to making these extended separations a little easier.
"It takes a village." I used to hate asking people for help. "I'm a stubborn and self-proclaimed 'independent woman' who does not need help." I also hate feeling like a burden on people. However, in my age and experience, I have grown to learn that it is ok to ask for help. Not only is it ok to ask for help, but I have truly learned to embrace it. I have learned that I literally would go crazy if I tried to do this all on my own. I have a circle of friends here who have my kids over for play dates and sleepovers to give me a break, they have brought them lunch at school when I forget, and they loved on my kids in their times of need. Yesterday, my neighbor had both of my kids over to play for practically the entire day, and fed them lunch! I was extremely thankful for that. It was nice to see my kids happy on a day they're normally sad for once.
Weekly Treat! Every Friday is what we call "breakfast Fridays". We get up a little earlier than usual, and I take the kids out for breakfast before school. It gives them something to look forward to all week, and I love how excited they get for Friday mornings. It's almost like a "good job! we made it another week!" treat for all of us. It also works as a countdown for us. My kids like to countdown weeks until Nick comes home by the "number of breakfast Fridays" we have left.

There are lots of other little ways to make these separations bearable, but these three things are what I consider the most helpful for my kids and me.

And of course, when Nick is home, we make sure to soak up as much time with him as possible. Sure routines get disrupted, and the house never stays clean, but I always remind myself of how short our time is together.

I hope everyone's New Year is off to a great start! Peace and hugs!

Sunday, December 31, 2017

2017 Highlight Reel

I wanted to blog about our family's Christmas in Nashville, but since it's New Year's Eve, I figured I'd give y'all my 2017 "highlight reel". 2017 was an amazing year for my family and me. It was a year of change, saying goodbye to the "old", and the start of new beginnings. Here are some of my favorite memories of this year!

We rang in the New Year with our wonderful neighbors!

I FINALLY got to order my Aggie ring in the Spring!

It was such an amazing feeling to get to do something I had waited my entire life to do!

It was definitely a day that will stick out in my mind forever.

Dannika chose to be baptized!

It was so special, because SHE chose to get baptized.

Nick won an award from the city of College Station for his work in our neighborhood!

Nick and Dannika went to their second daddy/daughter dance.

We Spring Breaked in Arizona!

D finished 2nd grade!

Our family did a little getaway to San Antonio!

Nick and I found ourselves back in SoCal in Laguna for our friend's wedding!

Dannika (and Addy) turned 8!

We found ourselves back in Southern California (in the inland empire this time) for ANOTHER wedding!

Dannika went to summer camp at Camp Carolina Creek!

Nick was promoted to MSgt!

My last day of college!

I FINALLY got my Aggie gold!!!!!!

Nick and I graduated TOGETHER!

Nick commissioned as a 2ndLt in the Marine Corps.

I dunked my Aggie ring in Michelob Ultra in 52 seconds!

Our family went on vacation to XCaret, Mexico!

My sweet boy turned 4!

Thanks to Hurricane Harvey, Dannika and Mattis started school a day late.

D started 3rd grade and Mattis started Pre-k!

Nick and a couple Aggie Marines got to go down to Houston and help out with Hurricane Harvey relief efforts!

My handsome boy's first school photo!

A rainy Halloween!

The Astros won the world series!

Snow in Texas! Crazy!

I got to finally meet my new niece, Zoe.

Ending the year with my main squeeze!

2017 was full of so much change, and I couldn't imagine doing it any other way. Our family got to do a lot of traveling, and got to spend it with the ones we love most. It's hard to believe that this time, next year, we will be living somewhere completely different! We are up for the challenge and new adventures that await us in 2018. I hope everyone had a wonderful year. For those who had a year of hurt and disappointment, I just wanted to leave you with this...
You are not alone. God sees you. As hard as it may be to be optimistic, I am a firm believer that a good attitude and optimism can change the world.

Happy New Year, y'all!

Monday, December 18, 2017

It's The Most...

Stressful time...Of. The. Year. It's not the shopping, or money, or lack of time to get everything done like most people. For me, it's the fact that between both of my kids and me, we have been passing back and forth this sickness. I don't think we have had a clean bill of health in this home for the last two weeks! Praying that we are all healthy and "disease free" before Christmas!

I made a big decision last week to ask my boss to cut back my time at work to be more present for my kids and my family. I missed out on a few trips up to D.C. for "Officer wife" events (sounds so pretentious, doesn't it?), and my kids have expressed to me that they miss seeing me around at their school. I used to volunteer at LOT at Dannika's school, and it was nice to really be involved in her school life. This was a tough decision for me, because I am the type of girl that needs to work outside of the home. I am not meant to be a stay-at-home mom. But I realized with Nick being gone, how much my kids really needed me. I am also grateful to be able to choose to ask to cut back on hours without it affecting our family income drastically. I am INCREDIBLY blessed to have a husband who provides for our family so that I can make small decisions like this without worrying about our finances.

It's strange that at 33 years old, the thought of asking my boss for less days at work gave me so much anxiety. You gotta remember that I spent ten years in the Marines. If I woulda asked my boss to "cut back my time at work" in the Marine Corps, I would have been laughed straight out of the hangar to the flighline. Now that I have the "freedom" to request such things, it's completely foreign to me. I googled, "how to ask your boss for less hours at work" more times than I'd care to admit. The funny thing is, my boss is one of the most approachable people I know, and yet, I was literally a fish out of water when it came to this. **Note to the Marine Corps transitioning class people and the VA: We (us Jarheads) need classes on things like this. Hey, resumé building classes and interview classes are important, but so are classes on things like, "how to ask for less hours" and "how to quit your job"! No one teaches us these things! lol. But in all honesty, I was afraid that he would say something like, "well, I really need you 5 days a week, so if you can't do it, I don't know if you'll be useful to our company." Which, BY THE WAY, I expressed to him a gazillion times when I had "the talk" with him (over the phone) that he did NOT need to feel obligated to keep me because he felt bad putting someone out of a job. Thankfully, he graciously kept me around, and starting in the new year, I will work less days at the office. It's a nice feeling to know that what you've been doing at work is valuable enough that they want to keep you around. It's a huge weight off my chest knowing that I will have this time to be a mom to my kids and a better wife to my husband. It's also a relief to me that I will still get that "adult time" out of the home in a professional setting and working.

I'm truly blessed with the company I work for, as well as the support system I have within it.

So here's some of my life in pics!

I work out...

Every day.

It's the only time I get of "me" time, and I get two free hours of childcare at the gym!

#winning