Sunday, September 24, 2017

Three's Company

Nick left today for TBS (The Basic School). For all you non Marine types, TBS is a 6 month long school that all Marine Officers must attend before getting assigned an MOS and going into the fleet. I chose to stay back in Texas with the kids for several reasons:
1. We LOVE Dannika's school here so much, and we really wanted to make sure she got every she could out of this school before we are permanently assigned somewhere else.

2. For our family, I felt it was best for us to keep Dannika in the same school for her entire 3rd grade year. If we would have gone with Nick, we would have taken her out of school for AT LEAST a week while we moved and settled in, and put her in a brand new school for just 6 months...just to pull her out again when our family got orders.

 3. I will be more lonely at TBS than being here without Nick. I don't know anyone there. Virginia is cold in the winter. Nick will spend many long hours and nights in the field, and I will hardly get to see him anyway.

4. This is my home. A born and raised, proud and true Texan! I have friends and a village here that I am already depressed about having to leave next year. I am willing to sacrifice my husband to TBS as a geobachelor (what they call married Marines who choose to go to a duty station sans family) if I get to be with my friends, family, and my village for just a little while longer.

I'm a little sad, but I am more heartbroken for my kids...especially Dannika. Dannika is our "seasoned" military brat. She has gone through two combat deployments, a year long separation, and countless other separations due to training evolutions. I thought she would be ok. I really thought Mattis would be the one that I would have to worry about.

All day today, I could see the sadness on Dannika's face, and when I asked her how she was doing, she would put on a brave front, and tell me she was ok. I could see her eyes get a little watery and red sometimes as she told me she was fine. Meanwhile, Mattis has no clue, and carried on like he normally does.

Separations are nothing new for our family, but as a MECEP'er, Nick was never away. He was more physically present than he has ever been in our entire marriage. We were "spoiled" as a military family, and at times, I felt guilty. I felt guilty as I watched my friends' spouses deploy to combat and/or go train for extended periods of time....while I got to enjoy having my husband home almost every night.

So I am back in "solo parenting" mode. I never call myself a "single parent". Single parents deal with a whole another list of struggles that I do not need to worry about. But solo parenting sucks too. You have two kids who absolutely love their absent parent (who is normally present on a daily basis)...an absent parent who is devastated to have to leave their perfectly happy home because of the demands of a career....and the "solo parent" who is home raising children, and making sure that they know that their "absent parent" loves them so much...more than anything....and it is not their choice to be gone....

Either way...this is the life I married into. I would not trade it for anything. I would not trade Nick for a man who makes 10 times more than him and is home all the time. Money or time can not buy a man who loves God, leads his family unselfishly, loves people, works hard, and is humble...every. single. day.


 Our cul de sac threw Nick and amazing going away BBQ last night. 
So many people showed up to say goodbye!
This is Nick and his two BFF's from the Cul de Sac.
These two men have been such great friends to Nick, and we are so fortunate that God put them in our family's lives.

On Saturday, we all went to the new trampoline park in town.
Nick had a BLAST (probably more fun than the kids).
I love this photo of my sweaty D, and Nick....

Packing to leave...
It's been a few years since I've sat in the garage with Nick before he deploys or leaves...
I watch him pack up his life......
It's bittersweet.
I know he's excited to move on to the next chapter of his career, but at the same time, he's sad about leaving his family.
He's such a family man....

So the kids and I are fine!
By the time we get into a routine, we'll get into our "groove", and things will be "normal".
Thanks to all my wonderful friends who called, texted, and FB'ed me to let me know y'all were thinking of me. 
I am so grateful for each and every one of you!!!!!

2 comments:

  1. I really hope the time goes by fast! Hugs to you all!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I hope the time goes by quickly for y'all, but not so quickly that you don't enjoy your last 6 months in Texas! Andy and I considered geobaching for Recruiting duty but ended up not doing so. Speaking of Recruiting, I will have to email you sometime and pick your brain about Recruiting duty. It's a struggle and we need advice!

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