Sunday, May 20, 2012

Under Appreciation

Sorry I've been MIA for a while!
Since Nick's been gone, life went back to being extremely hectic.
Single motherhood 
(Total shout out and props to all the single parents out there who are REALLY single parents...I don't know how you raise such amazing children on your own, but my little taste of single parenthood really make me appreciate Nick more!)
Full time job
and everything else that comes with being alone makes life a little crazy.
It actually feels MORE hectic than it did when he deployed.
I think when he deploys, my mind is in a different state than it is in right now.

This week is the first week I truly felt a little under appreciated for all that I do.
I never ask for "props", and when people tell me things like, "I don't know how you do it. I could never do it."...I just brush it off and kinda give them the awkward, "It's not a big deal, really."

People at work gave me a little bit of a rough run this week.
 Trying to explain to a male Marine who's wife is a stay at home mom, WHY I can't stay later than I already have because I HAVE to pick up my child from daycare....
I might as well have been talking to a missile launcher in my shop.

I know exactly the thought that was going through his head.
"It's not MY fault or MY problem that you chose to have children while being a dual active duty couple. You need to figure it out and make it work. The Corps comes first"
(and no, the Corps does not come first in my life....God, marriage, children, CORPS...)
Yep...people actually think like that cause I used to think the same way, and yes...
I do realize now that it is an ignorant way of thinking.
I never realized how hurtful that was until it happened to me.

I also felt a little under under appreciated from my husband.
He's always been my rock, and he is an amazing man.
I know it's unfair of me to say this, but let's face reality here...
He's NEVER been home alone as a working, "single", father for even ONE DAY!
I couldn't help but feel a little bit jealous when he called to tell me last night that he was going out with the guys for dinner and to a bar for drinks.
I know I'm not the only woman who feels this way....military family or not.

Our husbands go away on TAD, westpac, or business trip...an obligation for work...
And on their free time, they get to go out and have all kinds of fun while you're sitting at home watching Mulan with a toddler who is destroying your house.

Yeah...sucks.

I guess I'll just have to get over it.

And just to clarify,
the key to getting over the little jealousy you have when they get to do things like that and you don't...
Just call them and talk to them.
Communication is key (as cliche as that sounds).
You'll find out that most of the time (if you have a good husband), they feel bad that they get to do fun things like that.
I called Nick this morning (angry at first cause Dannika was up at 3am vomiting and had wet the bed)....but he made me feel a little better.
Nick has an amazing way of making me feel appreciated when he does.
I just have to remind him every once in a while.
*wink*

I made a "blog facebook page" cause I was getting some really weird and random friend requests from like guys in India....FOR REAL! So, if you want to keep up with my family on facebook, either click my facebook link at the top right hand part of my blog or just click HERE!

Here are some pics from my week.

Nick and his mum...adorable, isn't he?

I got to meet Rickey Gadson at a safety fair on the flightline. He is a 9 time World Champion motorcycle drag racer sponsored by Kawasaki. I also got his autograph!

This is Dannika and Elizabeth. Elizabeth is our neighbor's granddaughter.

Pretend sleeping.



2 comments:

  1. Im a full time mom and I still get annoyed when my hubby says hes meeting the guys for a drink, or going to cylcing or golfing. I know his week's are hard, but I get resentful when he doesnt realized that my 'job' is never ending. Good bless you for trying to find the balanace between working full time and taking care of your girl!

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  2. Thanks for the sweet comment! That's so random that you found my blog without knowing who I was first haha Awesome. Yeah, I was wondering where my cookbook was until Jake came home and told me :P It's my my favourite one because it uses a lot of faux meats but it has some great ones. The pierogies are really good! I'm going to review it on Friday. I'm excited for the pot luck! it's so nice that anyone is making a vegan dish :) I think I'm going to bring some raw fruit tarts and maybe zucchini sticks... Jake said someone wanted those?

    It's definitely different for someone in your position and I'm sure many people who have never had to experience that just won't understand. Even my husband probably wouldn't get it! I think it's admirable though. So I'm giving you props and saying job well done! :) Just remember that for every person who doesn't sympathize... there are a bunch who do.

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